Dear Jay-sonn DeROOlo (yyyeah, J-J-J-JR!),
I only have one thing to say to you: “Much more than a Grammy award, that’s how much you mean to me.”
Wow. I’m just…just so flattered. I think.
“You could be my it girl, baby you the shit girl.”
“I don’t want you to leave me, though you caught me cheating…when the roof caved in and the truth came out, I just didn’t know what to do, but when I become a star, we’ll be living so large, I’d do anything for you.”
Oh, okay, Jason. Sorry, I didn’t realize you were on your way to becoming rich and famous. I can definitely look past the fact that you slept around while I’m here trying to support your broke ass, definitely, because one day, you’ll have money.
I hope you realize from the above responses that I am a strong-willed, logical, and intelligent woman. Because of this, I feel as though it’s my duty not to like your music.
SO WHY CAN’T I STOP LISTENING TO IT?!
Begrudgingly a fan,